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>>>>> FETISHES <<<<<
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- Latex Nascar dads
- Saran Wrap muumuus
- Prostate decoupage
- Consumer electronics owners manuals read aloud through a snorkel by a sunburnt pygmy wearing a fruit leather saddle
- Yodeling quadriplegics
- Genital goatees
- Cholesterol play
- Abusive Hasidim
- Freudian psychotherapy
- Wally/Beaver role-playing
- Inconsolable weeping
- Penis inside orifice
- Loofahed eyeballs
- Average-looking mommies in baggy cotton sweatsuits
- Sign language dirty talk
- Cakehole composting
- Placenta taunting
- Homeless veterans
- Facial mole depilation
- Comatose disciplinarians
- Posterior Cheez-Wiz induction
- Funeral processions
- Hannity & Colmes
- Forced jazzercise
- The War on Terror
- Singed elbow hair
- Being pummeled like a human piņata until vomiting seaweed salad over a bed of sushi rice artfully arranged at the feet of a Toshiro Mifune mannequin
- The crunch of Zwieback
- Vintage taxidermy groping
- Chemotherapy
- National Public Radio
- Salmon roe gargling
- She-Hulk
- String theory
- Inclement weather
- Yahtzee! prodigies
- Emotionally unavailable mulattos
- Arthritic knuckle worship
- Self-immolation
- Disembodied animal lips sewn to a kite flying over kindergarteners at recess
- Greasy public telephones
- Armed robbery reenactments
- Cellulite dimples
- Lethal Injections
- Doin' it in a Subaru
- Kevin Costner impersonators
- Auto-voyeurism
- Liverwurst thongs
- Stern giantesses in Wal-Mart aprons
- Still-warm buttock imprints on vinyl-upholstered diner booths
